Nocturnal Works death doula resources

Mental Health Emphasis

Surviving Versus Thriving

Yesterday, I was coming out of a meditative state and my mind turned to thriving – what it means to be doing very well mentally, spiritually or however you choose to refer to it. After my own difficulties more than a decade ago, I found myself just trying to survive. Due to the difficulties experienced, I was anxious and depressed. This went on for some years. Time and being away from the cause of the stress helped, but my emphasis for years was on surviving. I was not in a place to consider what my best self looked like, I was just swimming for the shore.

After years of work on my own mental health, including the best thing I have ever done for myself – starting a consistent meditation practice – I have finally found myself in a good enough space where I can truly imagine my best self. What does he look like? I will discuss that more in the coming months, but suffice it to say he is pursuing his dreams of creativity, passion and openness.

Mental Health Emphasis

As I have moved from surviving to thriving, my focus on mental health work shifts. For those who have worked through their distress, what is next? We all yearn for more than to have the energy to get out of bed each day. We want to make a difference. We want love and affection. We want to hope for a better world. I became involved with Positive Psychology a decade or so ago and while I will no doubt have things to add to this site from the research into what makes us thrive from a Positive Psychology perspective, my instincts tell me that thriving is more than what quantitative analyses can provide. Self-actualisation must include the subjective and qualitative aspects of what it means to be human.

I am thinking at the moment that this emphasis will see me wearing my educator hat a lot more, as I explore and share what it might mean to thrive mentally. Educator or counsellor? Perhaps these labels are both too restrictive – we shall see! As I matured in counselling and realised that all assistance is ultimately non-directive and that the client is the expert in his or her own life, I began to see my role shift from therapist to educator. I will continue this journey here.

Becoming Your Best Self

Who will you be when you are your best self? I cannot say. No one else can answer that for you, but it might help to get some insights into what has meaning for others and what makes them thrive. I hope that the coming resources on this site will inspire you and help you to hope for the future. Your future is what you make it.

Aroha nui,

Lee Jordan signature

Gerald Lee Jordan, MBA, MEd, MCouns ❤️

About Death Doulas

Death Doulas - also referred to as End of Life Doulas - provide emotional and other support to the dying and their families. Support can be psychological (e.g. counselling), physical (aiding with exercise), clerical (helping with completing documents, including advanced directives), documentary (recording messages, including final messages for the dying), ceremonial (e.g. helping plan and/or deliver funerals) and other assistance which is not medical in nature. Death doulas are not doctors, they are not nurses and they are not solicitors/lawyers. They are brought in at the request of the dying and/or family and they are there to help the person transition from life.

About Nocturnal Works

The content on this site is provided to give resources and support to those dying, their loved ones and those providing death doula (end of life) support. When we find out that death is near and the initial shock wears off, emotions and questions flood into our minds. Noctural Works exists as place where you can find out about mental health issues and therapy related to death, dying, grief and bereavement - as well as more practical support, such as planning for death and supporting others on their journey.

The resources on this site are provided by Death Doula Ltd, a company in Aotearoa New Zealand which provides end of life doula support online, in Wellington, Blenheim and Picton (New Zealand). These resources are not legal or medical in nature, so do no rely upon them, but seek legal and medical advice, as required. If you are interested in counselling resources not focusing on death and dying, you can visit our other site, Therapy Aroha.